Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 3 (2023)

This is typically deemed the best Marvel Cinematic Universe movie to come out since Spider-Man: No Way Home. So why did I wait this long? Perhaps I wanted a break after recent underwhelming entries. Perhaps I feared that I had to watch Thor: Love and Thunder to understand enough. Thankfully, as I later learned, Thor parted ways with the gang early on.

Rocket (Bradley Cooper) has never told the other Guardians about his past, but it catches up with him when the forces of his "creator," Orgocorp, attempt to recapture him for neurological study. The Guardians fend off powerful emissary Adam Warlock (Will Poulter) for the nonce, but Rocket is left comatose and fading. Standard medical procedures won't work, thanks to Orgocorp's nasty bio-programming. The heroes' best bet is to swipe an override sequence right from the heart of Orgocorp. Hey, it matches their skillset.

The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)

So this is how I break my Oscar nominee streak: with something the Academy would probably never honor. It is extraordinarily popular for a video game adaptation, even among adults in my circles, but professional critics aren't as thrilled. I went in with cautious optimism.

Brooklynite fraternal twins Mario (Chris Pratt) and Luigi (Charlie Day) have a failing plumbing business when they happen upon a long-hidden pipe that sucks them into another world, albeit in separate directions. In the Mushroom Kingdom, Mario meets friendly fungal fellow Toad (Keegan-Michael Key), who surmises from his details that Luigi wound up in the clutches of King Bowser (Jack Black), a sort of turtle-dragon hybrid bent on world conquest. Their best bet for saving Luigi is to team up with another displaced human, Princess Peach Toadstool (Anya Taylor-Joy), who's already planning to stop Bowser via an alliance with gorilla king Cranky Kong (Fred Armisen) and his son Donkey (Seth Rogen). Mario may be short, but he is dedicated, and his past unlucky antics have honed his athletic skills even before he's introduced to power-up items.

Onward (2020)

This was probably the only movie I had been planning to see in a theater until the shutdown. I have since consoled myself by recalling how family fare tends to draw noisy kids.

The setting is populated entirely with the folk and fauna of European myths and legends, but the diverse civilization's modern technology has supplanted traditional wizardry, and the thirst for quests has given way to more secure living. On his 16th birthday, suburban elf Ian (Tom Holland) receives a posthumous set of gifts from his father, who died of an unspecified illness before they could meet: a staff, a phoenix gem, and instructions to cast a spell to let Dad materialize for 24 hours. Ian does turn out to possess an innate magical aptitude that his college-age brother, Barley (Chris Pratt), lacks, but something goes wrong with the spell, and only Dad's clad lower half appears, showing signs of intelligence but sensing the world only by touch. Unsatisfied, the brothers drive off with their leashed half-dad to hunt for a second phoenix gem before the next sunset, Ian half-trusting Barley's knowledge from a history-inspired role-playing game to have sufficient basis in their reality.

Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2 (2017)

I had enjoyed the first GotG but had trouble ranking it with respect to other parts of the Marvel Cinematic, er, Universe. It's just so different. First of all, very little takes place on Earth, and only one major character, Peter "Star-Lord" Quill (Chris Pratt), is even half human, tho others tend to have an implausible similarity. Second, the Guardians are antiheroes, first teaming up for a prison break. Third, they're mostly rather subtle in powers, and their equipment isn't very innovative. The movie relied almost entirely on a sense of fun via dialog, emotion, and retro references. It worked, but I had yet to see how well it could work again, apart from the perhaps overly faithful first episode of the ensuing TV series.

Vol. 2 first shows the Guardians, having earned their moniker, doing what they do when the galaxy isn't facing clear and present danger: mercenary work. And a little theft on the side by the most corrupt ones, which is why such big-time saviors still have a lot of people after their hides. But those pursuers are arguably incidental to the main plot. Peter finally meets his mysterious biological father, Ego (Kurt Russell), who's actually extremely powerful and offers to share his wonders. Gamora (Zoe Saldana) thinks it's too good to be true, especially after hints from Ego's empathic companion, Mantis (Pom Klementieff); but Peter, tired of his unrequited crush on Gamora, dismisses the suspicion as resentment. Of course, anyone familiar with stories in general should guess who's correct....